牧者心聲
決定
程續戰牧師
2022 年 5 月 14 日／15 日
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回想信主初期，有屬靈長輩提醒我：不要在混亂的狀態下作決定！然而，我偶然仍會犯此毛病，原因相信是急進的決定、回應可以即時減輕或解除我的苦惱和負擔。感恩，在後來的進修中，我發覺靈修神學講師賴玉芳老師的提醒與屬靈長輩早年的話不謀而合。老師指出在神枯（Desolation）的時候，不要做任何的決定或改變已訂下的計劃，卻要持守神枯前、或上次神慰（Consolation）後所定的決心及所做的決定。所謂「神枯」和「神慰」，是指：
神慰：即靈性上的安慰，能推動我們走近天父，記號之一是我們會深刻地經驗到神的臨在、和主對自己的愛，因而信心、盼望、喜樂和勇氣等會增多，叫我們願意冒險接受挑戰和慷慨大方地給予，而且樂意等待和具有耐心，人如盛放著的花朶，能關注自身以外的人和事。
神枯：即靈性上的乾枯，會推動我們離開天父，以致信、望、愛三德減退，外面雖有條理，裡面卻沉重焦慮、忙亂不安，自以為是地判斷他人，有如快將凋謝的花朵。
假如你是在神枯中，不用擔心，那其實是天父要我們有所更新的邀請，祂會以愛光照我們，讓我們看見自己和天父的心意有差異，因而快快回到祂跟前禱告、再禱告，持守著盼望。如能這樣，神慰不久就會回來。因此，我們在作決定前要先分辨自己處於哪種狀態，從而幫助自己察驗甚麼是神的旨意，即甚麼是那美善的、神所喜歡的、完全的事（羅十二 2）。
之前我曾面對過一件艱難的事，我因當中的人和事而很感激動，但感謝主幫助我覺察（be aware）自己正處於情緒不穩定的狀態中，在主的光照下，我明瞭（understand）自己正在神枯中，知道這不是應該作決定和回應的時候，之後我參照陳孝慈所著的《人際衝突與靈命塑造》，不斷禱告：「求主耶穌的寶血洗淨我，天父的恩典覆蓋我，聖靈的能力剛強我。」隨後主就提醒我怎樣回應才是對當事人較為合適，就這樣，我的心情便漸漸平靜了，主幫助我進入神慰當中，同時也幫助我選用了對當事人較合適的話去作出回應（Action）。
求主幫助我們在作出決定之前，先分辨自己是在哪一個狀態中。如果是在神慰中，就靠主勇敢作決定；倘若是在神枯中，就不要作決定，倒要再三禱告，直至回到神慰中，然後才靠著主作決定。
Pastor's Sharing
Making Decisions
Rev Jenny Ching
I remember that in the early years of my conversion, a spiritual mentor reminded me that I should not make decisions in a state of confusion. At times, this is still my weakness because I thought hasty decisions and responses could bring instant relief to my troubles and burdens. Now I am much grateful that I found echoes to that reminder from my spiritual theology lecturer Sandy Lai during my subsequent studies. The lecturer advised that no decisions be made and no plans changed in times of spiritual decay (Desolation). Rather, we should stick to pre-Desolation resolutions and decisions and cherish those made immediately after the last divine condolence (Consolation). "Desolation" and "Consolation" means:
Consolation: This is spiritual condolence that moves us nearer to the Heavenly Father. One of the signs is that we will deeply experience the presence of God and the Lord's love for us. The result is that our faith, hope, joy and courage will increase. We will be prepared to take risks to meet a challenge or generously and graciously give. We will be happy to wait and have patience, like a flower in full bloom. We will be able to care about the people and matters around us.
Desolation: This is spiritual decay that moves us away from the Heavenly Father. The result is that our faith, love and hope deteriorate. We may look organized on the outside but within, we are heavy-hearted, anxious, confused and uneasy. We judge others self-righteously, but we are really like a withering flower.
If you are in Desolation, do not worry. That is in fact an invitation for renewal from the Heavenly Father. The Father’s love will shine on us so that we see the discrepancy between our will and His. We will quickly draw near to Him to pray and pray, cherishing our hope. When that happens, Consolation will soon take place. Therefore, before we make any decisions, we need to first identify which state we are in, and by that help ourselves "test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will" (Romans 12:2).
Earlier, I ran into something really difficult. The people and what happened at that time really got me going. But thank the Lord for helping me to realize (be aware) that I was in a state of emotional instability. In the light of the Lord, I saw (understand) that I was in the midst of Desolation. I knew it was no time to make decisions or responses. Later, I took reference to the book, Interpersonal Conflict & Spiritual Formation, by Hau-Chee Chan. I prayed and prayed: "Cleanse me with the precious blood of the Lord Jesus, cover me with the grace of the Heavenly Father and strengthen me by the power of the Holy Spirit." After the prayer, the Lord revealed to me the sort of response that would be more appropriate to the people involved. My heart gradually calmed down. The Lord helped me enter Consolation and choose words that were more appropriate in responding to those concerned (Action).
May the Lord help us identify our state before we make any decisions. If in Consolation, we can make decisions boldly with total dependence on the Lord. If in Desolation, let us not make any decisions, but pray and pray until we are back to Consolation. Then we can make decisions, depending fully on the Lord.
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